Writing Challenge Day 26: I’ve always wondered…

You can refer back to the 30 questions and original writing challenge post HERE

DAY 26: I’ve always wondered…

Why we can’t throw the facade of perfection out the window!!! I admit I played into this stereotype through my 20s. I didn’t help the cause. But last week I had the most amazing and vulnerable discussion with a girlfriend. She was saying just how HARD it was being a mother to a new baby. How TIRED she was. I didn’t for one second think she was whining or negative or complaining. She was speaking her truth and I fell even more in love with my friend in this moment because even after months of not speaking, we could be REAL and RAW right off the bat. It seems we can’t celebrate our highs because we are bragging or creating an illusion of perfection…We can’t be vulnerable and say “This is really fucking hard right now” or “I am struggling” because we will be portrayed as “negative” or a whiny little bitch. I am kind of done with it all. I want real and honest conversations. I want to know that I am not alone in this roller coaster of life. I want to know when you are on top of the world and everything is going right because it lifts my spirits and gives me hope. Just as equally I want to know when life is kicking your ass so I can stand in solidarity and know I am not alone when it kicks my ass. Perfection is so fucking boring. I want your messy self to SHOW up with NO fear of having to preface something with “I am usually a positive person” (I admittedly do this too!)…before saying that life is HARD today or you are feeling sad, anger, depression, anxiety. Think of how much closer and more relatable we would be as a nation and world if we could realize that ALL our problems are pretty fucking universal and you aren’t the only one to have a particular experience or feel a certain way. Let’s talk about the good stuff, the bad stuff and the hard stuff. And especially the taboo stuff like sex, relationships, abuse, feminism and let’s NOT be ashamed! We all (me included) need to own our story more and be who we are…not the illusion of what we want portrayed. The more we show up as ourselves, the more we create a space for others to show up as themselves…Let’s start today. Write a comment and tell me something. Good, Bad, Ugly, Dirty (not pervy!), Blissful or Tragic. Let’s be honest right here, right now…

I’ll start…The Vegas massacre and Harvey Weinstein news has kicked my ass. I am an empath and it hit too close to home. I have been sexually harassed and touched inappropriately and stayed quiet. It kills me that I have but hearing these woman speak out makes me feel a bit stronger. More camaraderie. Anyways, it took me a few weeks to snap out of my trauma mind and second hand trauma which by the way are REAL and need to be talked about more. I will write about that at a later time but know if you are feeling depressed, anxious, anger, sadness or gloomy…you could have a second hand trauma reaction to the events of the world and need to give yourself space to feel this. It is ok to feel it. It is NORMAL. And real. And your truth. So sit with it and the best you can, release it when you feel ready. I released mine on the trails…I ran and cried and admired the beauty of the world. I emerged from a 10 mile trail run a liberated woman. It felt good. But I needed that time and space to navigate my own feelings and emotions. I can still be one of the most optimist and happy people that I know but I can also get my ass kicked sometimes. And I own it. Writing also helps me. It is my creative outlet. I am who I am and I am learning each day to fall more in love with all the aspects of myself and my spirit. Let’s be real and honest. Let’s destroy the illusion of perfection. Let’s be who we ARE.

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