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How did I know it was time to do an Ironman …

How did you know it was time to do an Ironman?

I get asked this question a TON. It is a valid question. I remembering thinking I was bat shit crazy seconds after signing up. I still kind of do … I mean is it normal to want to put ourselves through that rigorous training and day? Probably not … But what is normal. Normal is boring. You know what is not boring to me.

LIVING a life of PASSION and FIRE and LOVE. Doing whatever it is you love regardless of how it looks to anyone else.

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One of my best friends, that I ironically met through Triathlon, sent me a text last night:

The best thing about the Tri world: I will NEVER feel alone ever again.

AMEN! Many people may not understand your decisions. Many people may not understand your hobby or sport. BUT guess freaking what!?! There are a lot who DO! No matter if you are doing Ironman or play Dungeons and Dragons. No matter the hobby. When you find that spark and passion you will find others who have the same. And those people become an essential part of your journey.

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And then God bless the ones that don’t understand and yet still show up. Listen to you complain. Hold your lipstick. Take your children to your events. Drive you. Help undress you. Massage you. Fly around the country for you. And paint your nails so when you are out there and the low moments hit you can at least look down and smile because you have someone who loves you and is cheering for you. I feel extremely lucky to have this. I also know what it feels like to not have this at a race. I have gone to a race alone. Turns out I met a new friend at that race last September and now his wife is one of my favorite people in the Universe … And he is one of my favorites too! If you have to race alone … Speak up. Talk to people. You never know who is around the corner that you may meet and will become a forever friend or play an important role in your life.

Yes but HOW do you decide to take the plunge to 140.6 … Now that answer will vary for most people. So this is my experience. It was the right time and place … And a lot of magic lined up for me. Plus … The Universe had plans for that Finish Line and there are still stories left untold about that day in Tempe, Arizona back in November 2015 …

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I knew it was time for me to do an Ironman when I decided that my dream of that finish line was more important to me than the fear of failure …

That the love of MY sport was so strong that standing on the edge of the cliff became too painful. I had to take the leap to dream really big but in doing so I had to be unattached to the landing. 

We are studying and meditating on FEAR this month in our online meditation group and one repeated theme is the fear of failure. It is a driving force in MANY people’s lives. Especially with our sports.

What if I don’t finish?

What if I don’t get the time I want?

What if I look stupid doing it?

What if something happens outside of my control and I can’t finish?

What if I let EVERYone down because I don’t finish? Everyone is here for ME and I have to finish!

What if I just fail and can’t do it? It is too tough physically, mentally or spiritually?

WHAT IF.

These are valid and I am positive that at least one of these has crossed each of our minds at some point.

But …

WHAT IF we toss out the what ifs…then what?

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You are left standing on the cliffside. Watching everyone else participating below you. Having fun. Smiling. Cheering for each other. Enduring pain but Riding highs. You want it. You want it so bad. You want to jump into the mix and PLAY too. You can visualize crossing that Finish Line. You can visualize falling into the ones you love most arms. You can taste the victory tears. You can feel the pride.

You are ready.

It is time to wave good-bye to the What Ifs and JUMP baby!

JUMP and then DIVE head first. Don’t fear the jump. Don’t fear the fall. The fall is where you learn to FLY!!!

And fly you will. The flying is the journey and that is where the change comes. It is an internal change as well as the physical transformation. You will soar through the highs and lows with class and humility. You will smile. You will cry. You will succeed during the journey because you were willing to try. To FLY.

And when you land … You may land smoothly. You may crash. But you will be OK either way. Because the landing is just one tiny piece of the experience. It doesn’t define you. The landing NEVER will define you as a person. That is what the journey is for. You have to become unattached to the landing to enjoy the flight.

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So indulge me while I answer a few of these questions …

What if I don’t finish?

Then you don’t finish. I can guarantee it will be hard BUT it happens and is life. Professionals don’t finish at times. Sometimes not finishing is the lesson needed to be learned. What you do with the “not finish” will define you more as a person than the finish. Are you going to stand back up and try again. Keeping playing. Keep participating in what you love? YES YOU ARE. Because that is just the kind of person you are! Give it your all and don’t worry if it takes you 90 times to “finish”…Keep playing and you will one day finish.

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What if I don’t get the time I want?

This is a real concern for many. Many train for times. Please and I beg you please don’t let a time you don’t like take away from the journey and experience of the day. YES … it is overwhelmingly frustrating. I empathize. BUT how can you throw away an experience for a number. Get your ass back up and toss a smile on your face. Thank the volunteers and people who love you. And then TRY TRY TRY again. This isn’t the last race. The last event. Don’t beat yourself up … When you beat yourself up you lose a bit of the passion and playfulness that captured your spirit and brought you into the sport to begin with. Just keep trying and tweaking. You will get there. Maybe not today but that doesn’t mean that today was a “bad day” or disappointing. It simply means with no attachment … the number on the clock didn’t match what you wanted. And that doesn’t define YOU or a DAY in your life one bit. Be grateful to participate and just keep on moving forward.

What if I look stupid doing it?

I wear hot pink lipstick and shimmery sunscreen and about 25 bracelets and carry Reiki stones in my sports bra. Look stupid. The stupider the better. Period. Plus stupid is a stupid word. You look like a mother fucking badass for competing!!!!! That is more than 99% of the population can say! That aint stupid my dear. Own YOU!

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What if something happens outside of my control and I can’t finish?

It happens. Shit happens. Refer to the answer above about not finishing. If you can’t control it … You CAN control your attitude. And it sucks. So get pissed. Like really freaking angry. And then let it go and try again!IMG_2515

What if I let EVERYone down because I don’t finish? Everyone is here for ME and I have to finish!

They love YOU. You won’t let anyone down. Everyone is there for you … Trust me they wouldn’t spend a 17 hour day chasing your ass around 140.6 miles if they didn’t love you to death! But equally. They don’t love you less because of an outcome. Or love you more for that matter. They just love YOU. Nobody on social media cares. If you feel like you “failed” and let people down because you went for a goal you are wrong. I can promise the support will be overwhelming either way. And in the end … it is YOUR story and your experience. Not anyone else’s. And anyone who matters will LOVE you more the next day than they did the pervious. Because that is just how true love works. You fall more in love each day. With your family and friends and lover.

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What if I just fail and can’t do it? It is too tough physically, mentally or spiritually?

Refer again to the answers above. It is tough but you are tougher! If it gets too tough maybe the timing isn’t right and it is ok to admit that. Period.

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In the end. You will KNOW. You will just KNOW in your heart of hearts. Your desire to participate will overcome all. You will sign up. You will train. You will change. And your life will NEVER ever be the same.

Because of the leap of faith.

Because of the journey.

Because of that FINISH LINE.

Visualize it. Believe with every fiber of your soul you will achieve it. Imagine the lights and sounds when you cross.

VISUALIZE.

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And then work. Work your heart out.

Dream BIG. Dream really freaking BIG.

Do the work.

Believe in the MAGIC.

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Have a good weekend my loves!

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