Do you ever step away from something and when you examine it after whatever period of time it may be, you see everything through new eyes. It may be a new disinterest or maybe a new refound love. Things may be more black and white than before and some things may be as bright as a double rainbow across a baby blue sky. Essentially I reflect on….
Does distance REALLY make the heart grow fonder?
My favorite Disney princess Elsa has some powerful words…
It’s funny how some distance
Makes everything seem small
And the fears that once controlled me
Can’t get to me at all
It’s time to see what I can do
To test the limits and break through
No right, no wrong, no rules for me,
I’m free!Let it go, let it go
I am one with the wind and sky
Let it go, let it go
Which brings me to my next thought about a quote I once heard. Instead of quoting it directly I want to say what it means to me right now. It goes something like … When you are away from something and then come back, everything looks the same, acts the same, smells the same, is the same … But there is something different and you can’t quite pinpoint it. Then in a moment. A flash. You realize that it is YOU that is different.
People in general freak out about the word change. “You’ve changed” seems to be a commonality among arguments between lovers, family and friends when one person “changes” and the other person feels threatened by it. Whether it is out of their own fear of abandonment or not being needed anymore or jealousy. I love change. I like to call change “GROWTH” however because it seems less threatening to those around us. My hope and wish for life is to be consistently growing. I believe that we are all the same spirit from brith to death. But in those years in-between those events we grow our mind, body and heart. Through experience. Through love. Through heartbreak. Through failure. Through laughing. Through others. Life is about living. Life is so precious.
Speaking of death, it has been on mind recently. I have spoken with many people who have lost someone close to them. I personally have had death in my life this year. Unexpected, from illness and just yesterday I learned that a favorite yoga instructor of mine took her life. I have so many thoughts. Grief accompanies death in various ways for every human soul. For me, I have had a reconfirmation this year that I need to treasure each and every day. Live life to the fullest. Use my body to do all the things I want to do and not take my heath for granted. LOVE harder because you truly don’t know what anyone is going through or suffering privately with. Everyone deserves love and kindness. Usually the trolls and mean people of the world are the ones who NEED (maybe not deserve, but NEED) it the most. I have a burning desire inside me to make sure I honor LIFE as it is. Every single day. And honor the relationships I have with people more than ever. Enjoy experiences and every single moment. LIVE in the moment and not for tomorrow. I want to teach my children to live this way as well. To be happy and not caught up on the petty nuances in life. This is one of my biggest missions as a Mom to teach them this lasting lesson.
Now somehow to tie this long ranting blog post back together…..
This is a massive passion of mine. I love writing. I want to write my whole life. I want to publish books and articles. I want to let my creativity flow and just be ME when I write. I am not classically trained. I make a bazillion grammar and spelling errors. My words are random and sometimes without any other purpose other than to write from my heart. (Like today! Haha!) But I love it. I dream of writing my whole life. Just as much as I dream of competing in triathlon as the oldest woman in history when I am 103 years old. Distance has made the heart grow fonder for me. Writing here no matter if it makes sense, is rambling or whatever the hell I do and say on here is something I plan on continuing to do. I am an imperfect writer who LOVES to write and be creative. I have no idea where writing will take me. And I am sure one day I will probably have to hire an editor to actually correct all my grammar mistakes! HAHAHA! But for today, because today is all I am given, I am writing in my own little space I have created. Happy and blissed out that I am able to do something I love to do. And grateful that when I came back to my chair, my laptop, my thoughts and started moving my fingers … that writing hadn’t forgot about me either. It seems we have missed each other and our passionate, sensual love affair has been rekindled. And for this moment, I am completely content and happy with the “now”. And that feels pretty damn good.